“A journey is best measured in friends, rather than miles.”

-Tim Cahill-

Parallel Lives

Nine months ago, I left Nashville. Four months ago, I left McAllen. The problem with Nashville was it was too easy to fall in love. In a parallel universe, I probably never left. Monday to Friday I’d work my way through the booming healthcare industry. Maybe after a few years I’d delve deeper into fitness, try my hand at the music industry, or even start my own business. Saturdays would be for wild honky tonks, growing professional sports teams, trendy cafes, and gourmet burgers. Sundays would take me for a run through Percy Warner Park or maybe out for a hike across the countless mountains and trails around Tennessee. The relationships I’d started would’ve further blossomed and new ones would sprout. Somewhere along the way I’d meet an amazing girl, get down on a knee, and build a team of CrossFit babies. Time would pass and I’d give up the midtown apartment for a house in East Nashville and then seek retirement a bit closer to the suburbs of Franklin, TN. Through the smooth and rough, life would be good. Actually, it’d be great.

The problem with McAllen was it was too familiar. You live in a town for eighteen years and you know it better than the image in the mirror. Every turn, street name, park, and building is inscribed in your mental maps. You can recite the stories of countless locals. The nine to five grind passes and you spend the small town evenings in the gym or relaxing with family. Weekends consist of get togethers with friends and barbeques with the extended family. The beach is only an hour away or if you need a city vibe, San Antonio is a relatively quick drive up north. You’re well integrated in the community and climb the same career ladder as anywhere else. Overall, it’s a very comfortable life and a majority of the people you care for most are within a stone’s throw. Once again, life would have been great and it would be hard to fault anyone that chose this path or the other. Joys would be plentiful and happiness in high abundance. However, neither of these lives was for me—at least not yet. Travel and immersion into new and unfamiliar places provides me with the stimulation and novelty that I currently enjoy. But, more than anything, it introduces me to the many wonderful people of the world I would not know otherwise.

Friends of Thailand

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What’s the best/worst part of travel? It’s a question many have asked me and many more before me have written about. Sometimes people ask it fishing for certain answers but when a good friend of mine recently asked, I knew they were genuinely asking for my thoughts so I sat and formed a more authentic answer. The first part felt like it could be answered in a million different ways while the second part had some obvious answers but was certainly more challenging. After a few minutes, I had the perfect answer to both: the people.

The people you meet abroad are what make the experience. Together, you get to share adventures, memories, and conversations—many of which will last a lifetime. In some capacities this will be momentary, while in others it can be for weeks, months, or even years. The friendships you make in passing allow you be be fearless and open to discussions you might shy away from with those you expect to know longer. Meanwhile, the friendships that are developed over the long-term become more intimate and empower you to learn more about other people and their culture. Everyone you meet has a story to tell and a lesson to teach. And through the collection of these stories and lessons, you are continually changed and shaped into yourself.

On the flip side of the coin, the worst part of travel is also the people. Well, it’s not actually them, but rather having to leave them that really sucks. Each and every time I’ve traveled, at some point, the overwhelming thought has come over me: this group will never again be all in the same place. Even in future planned meetups inevitably someone can’t make it or has to cancel last second. I don’t mean to sound like a pessimist but it’s just the reality of life. While in the moment it feels distressing, what this has taught me is to be more appreciative of each moment and who I’m spending it with. This goes for travel as well as my time at home because you never know how the dynamics might change in the future.

This Life

Leaving Nashville and then subsequently McAllen was by no means an easy decision. You try your best to keep in contact with everyone but unfortunately most conversations dwindle because it’s impossible to keep up with everyone all the time. You do keep in touch, it’s just never as often as would be ideal. But the tapered communications with old friends is readily replaced by new ones in an ever expanding network. It is for this reason, that I already know my decision to move to Thailand has been infinitely worth it. After all, if I hadn’t packed up and ventured out, I would never have bonded with a Thai tour guide about the shared human experience. I would never have sat in the streets of Bangkok at 3am with an Irish couple and cried about the injustices of the world. I wouldn’t have had the pleasure of taking a South African girl on a wonderful sushi date that ended under the stars on a private beach. I’d never have munched on a full bag of cooked beetles a Thai friend insisted I buy. I wouldn’t have been fake engaged to an American on New Year’s Eve. I’d never have laughed so hard with a Italian buddy through a tumultuous overnight bus ride. None of this nor many other countless memories with friends would have been possible. Travel may have provided the same environment, but the friends made the memories.

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The Wrap Up

With just another few weeks left before I pack up from Thailand and move on to the next chapter, I’ve begun a process of reflection on what I’ve learned both internally and externally over the last 4+ months. While I’m excited for the future, I am equally saddened by departing from the close relationships I’ve made. Ultimately, however, I am thankful for the friends of past, present, and future, for it is because of them that this world continues to be a perpetual inspiration and adventure.

If you liked this post then drop a comment below or share it with a friend! Also, I’d love to know: What’s an amazing adventure you’ve shared with friends?

Thanks for reading this post and as always, I encourage you to #gotravel!